Letting go of negativity can be extremely difficult at the best of times, but especially when we’re stressed. We’ve all experienced being unable to let go: when our mind, body and emotions go around in a closed loop, preventing us from clarity, peace, enjoyment of our daily experiences or restful sleep.
The ultimate benefit of being able to let go is to be able to bask in the flow of life, to enjoy life. Letting go of negative thoughts and energy opens up new possibilities, a new space within ourselves and new opportunities in the world.
In this article, I am going to explore 9 ways to learn to let go.
1 Acknowledge how you feel
Notice how you think and feel, acknowledge where you are in this moment within yourself. To be able to let go, we first need to be able to connect with ourselves and be an observer of what’s happening to us. Especially if it’s uncomfortable because this is when letting go will become useful.
2 Accepting positive and negative experiences
Although this can be difficult at times, we must try to be less absorbed in the positive and negative aspects of every single experience and instead see life as a multitude of different experiences. Stopping to identify each of them can be really useful and helpful in taking a step back and moving on.
3 Stop wanting to control it all
As human beings, it’s only natural to feel happier when we feel in control, but unfortunately, life does not always make it so. Accepting this enables us to see that the most empowering moments of our personal journeys are when we are not in control. It’s about acquiring a new belief that being in the flow of things isn’t about control, it’s about being centred and adaptable.
4 Saying ‘yes’ to your true self
As a Sophrologist, I support people as they find their purpose and values. It is an important part of the Sophrology method and enables us to define ourselves, be comfortable with who we are, know what we stand for, and what we contribute. Knowing who we are, our boundaries and limits will help us deal with the outside world more constructively.
Some experiences are just not for you and you don’t need to be everything to everybody or aim to do everything in your life in order to be happy. Knowing yourself is also about being able to set better boundaries and just say ‘no’. When you let go of the pressure to be everything to everyone, you start to say ‘yes’ to your true self.
5 Use your body and your breath
In Sophrology we learn to use the awareness of our body to transform the way we feel, think and process our reality. The body is a fantastic place to start learning to let go, especially for people who are constantly stuck in this never-ending mind loop.
Every practice we do includes body awareness, using our body in movement followed by a time of pause and integration. Taking pauses are a way to start learning to let go. Real letting go comes from learning to be comfortable in these pauses. They teach us to observe and accept the experience that presents itself.
6 Living in the here and now
Learning to be more present through our body but also in the present moment is key in being able to let go and be in the flow of life. Recognising that all we have is in the present moment and that everything we’ve experienced, even a few seconds ago, is already a dream and what we are going to experience in the future is also a dream. There are simple ways to help us be in the present moment with Sophrology. One is connecting to sensations and the breath which brings our awareness back to the present moment, listening to the sounds around us, listening to the breath, suspending our judgement but also making a conscious effort in the practice to let go of what has already passed.
You could also write down what has happened in your day and then consciously let it go. Just remembering how your day was before you sleep, perhaps being thankful for this day and then saying goodbye to it so you can freely move forward. All the experiences we’ve had today, this year, or in our entire life, are only a dream and we don’t need to hang on to them.
7 Work on your sleep
Sleep is the ultimate letting go if we sleep well and we are going into deep sleep that means we are already very able to let go! Bad sleep is often just a reflection of all the experiences we can’t fully process during the day. We take them with us at night. Sophrology offers many ways to help us let go and positively reset our sleep. For more information on this, refer to my book “The Life Changing Power of Sophrology” or the free webinar on my website.
8 Non-judgement, looking at things like it’s the first time
Especially in situations where we feel completely trapped or in relationships where things seem to be stagnant and painful, seeing moments through the eyes of a child can open up new possibilities. Meeting someone like it is the first time and suspending all judgement at this moment will be eye-opening. This is something we practice during Sophrology with our own sensation and thought so that it becomes easier to apply in daily life.
9 Everything is constantly changing in life
It helps to know and accept that life itself is constantly changing. There are always new possibilities offered to us if we are open to the fluid nature of life. One door closes and another one opens.
If we make mistakes or make the wrong decisions, there is always room for change. Accepting we can’t succeed or master everything, that we are not perfect, leads us towards evolution.
Therefore we always have a choice: either we resist it all and we hang on to everything or we accept that the only real constant in our lives is that we can choose to be this non-judging observing awareness throughout our experiences – that’s the ultimate way of letting go. It’s knowing that all our experiences are not us and therefore we can let go of them. It’s a journey to get to that place and that’s the journey of consciousness that Sophrology supports us with.